bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
