Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
My pussy is not your playground.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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