singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
