Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
