I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
