Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
