Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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