It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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