we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize