its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
this just has baby written all over it
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
