She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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