how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize