The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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