I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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