is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
