He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
