Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
