Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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