I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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