Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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