Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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