I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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