shes about as inviting as chlamydia
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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