i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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