Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
