Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
