What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
