Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I could make wine with my vomit
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
