So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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