in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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