Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize