Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
