She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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