Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
