I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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