So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
one might say we're banned from that church
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
