Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Everyone says I win the strip club
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
