Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize