His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
me + whiskey = a bad person
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize