What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
