at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Dick very happy bro
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
