I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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