i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize