covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
