You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I'm lost and stupid without you.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
