The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Sext me about skeletons
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
