I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
