nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
this boner is exhausting
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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