Will you blow on my dice?
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
