Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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